7:45 AM
September 19, 2026
Went outside
Ding. Door opened. Lanai inspected. Squirrel perimeter checked. Returned satisfied.
Recurring featureThy Bell.
Thy Bell.
Ding.
I have summoned my human.
The bell, explained
I ring the bell when I wish to go outside. I also ring it when I wish Mother to pay attention. Sometimes Mother opens the door and I decide I don't actually want to go outside. This is called having options.
The bell is not a request. The bell is a summons. The door is a courtesy. Whether I use it is, frankly, none of your business.
The log
Today's summons.
A partial record. The bell rings more than is strictly necessary. That is the point.
7:49 AM
September 19, 2026
Stayed inside
Ding. Door opened. Considered the weather. Declined. This is called having options.
8:12 AM
September 19, 2026
Attention only
Ding. Mother appeared. No intention of going outside. Mother confused. I am not.
3:30 PM
September 19, 2026
Went outside
Ding. Lanai Grand Prix initiated. Three laps. No squirrels apprehended. As expected.
In & OutThe revolving door,
The revolving door,
operated for my convenience.
I love the glass slider. I love going out. I love coming in. I love going out again. The routine is endless because the routine is the point.
Out: surveillance. In: refreshments. Out: the squirrels may have moved. In: my blanket misses me. The cycle continues until I am satisfied, which is to say: never.
The Original Doorbell
Before the bell, there was patience.
Tupak
Tupak, before Pixie: patiently waiting by the slider. He did not have a bell. He simply stood there, dignified, until someone noticed him. It never took very long.
Pixie
Pixie, after Tupak: DING.
Naturally, I have upgraded the system.